I am international postdoc and 7 months into my 1 year postdoc. My PI is very young and the lab is relatively new. I chose this lab because after the interview I was convinced that the PI and I had similar research interests. I had also made sure the work would be experimental in nature since that is what I am an expert in.
The research direction proposed seemed interesting and I have enjoyed working on the project. But there is a major mismatch between our attitudes. I do appreciate him taking the time out to listen to my research plan and goals but I just cannot bear the abusive nature of the PI. In my 6 months time he has humiliated me in front of the whole group twice (both for journal clubs), saying my presentations should be much better than what it is. The theoretical aspect of my work is not of my interest and he expects me to know each and everything about it even though it's a new topic for me. There is zero tolerance for any mistake or unanswered question.
Long story short, I feel under-confident and bullied I am convinced that I need to look for a new position and have already started contacting some potential advisers (no luck yet).
My questions are the following:
- How do I survive the remaining 5 months of my postdoc with an abusive mentor who has unreasonably high standards?
- I have been so stressed since the past month that I feel unfit for any position. How do I regain my confidence?
- How do I find a position without a reference letter from the current adviser?
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